Wife walking away

[LBSinTX]

It was mostly my teenage daughters that I alienated. I'm 44 and she's 35. I have a 14 and 16 year old from a previous marriage and she has a 19 year old from a previous relationship. We have a 7 and 8 year old together. We've been married for almost 9 years and together for almost 12. Our family didn't always blend very well, specifically with respect to my wife and my teenage daughters. I don't think she ever felt loved or respected by them. They came to live with us full time 2 years ago and we've had a lot of trouble, especially over the past year. My daughters were abandoned by their mom and my wife tried her best to be a mother to them but they never embraced her as such. We've been to counseling which really didn't help at all. I drove myself crazy trying to balance out all the personalities involved but everyone just drifted further and further apart. I couldn't make anyone happy. My wife and I never spent any time together away from the house.because if my worries I became so focused on her feelings and so needy. I pushed her away. I gave her so much grief about not being more affectionate. I asked for so much reassurance. I became so unattractive to her. If I'd stayed strong or knew how to act during those times I think we could've overcome the other issues in the household. I'm worried that too much damage has been done at this point. I want so desperately to turn it around. I know there is an OM involved now and I think things are moving very quickly. I'd been snooping and looked At cell phone records and there have been almost 300 texts a day between her and OM. I feel so deflated and hurt right now. Last night was our first night apart. This morning was a little tough for me. I cried for yet he first time in a week. Couldn't choke back the tears any more.