Hi 1Wish. Sorry to see you're here. What you're hearing from your wife is referred to as "script". Everyone here hears a different version of the same basic messages. Your wife is as confused as you are and will say a lot of contradictory things.
Me: 31, W: 29 T: 4 M: 2 Kids: 3 (SS: 7, SD: 4, D: 3) Separated, still living together: Nov 2013 Separate bedrooms: Feb 2014 W working away; kids with me: Nov 2014