For me, it is a simple choice...

What is best for the kids...

Is it being in that environment ??

Is it NOT having her therapy ??


Secondly...

Do you want to take the car, or kids to punish her ??

In some way, I would expect that answer to be a "yes" , and that is normal for this stage....

The best thing that I can tell you is....

Make your choices in regards to what is best for the kids...

After that, make your choices in regards to what is best for YOU...

And if THAT affects her social life ???

Then so be it...

It isn't your job to provide a nice soft, fluffy landing spot for the ramifications of her choices....

Not to punish, just because they are the right things to do...