Wife doesn't feel it... (Part 2)

[sandi2]

I have not been in your shoes with a WAS, but I did experience leaving my daughter in God's hands. She was so young and just M. He was in the military and they were moving far away. My D had been a very bad diabetic for years and had almost died several times. I was terrified at getting a call in the middle of the night, hearing my SIL say we had lost her. I couldn't live like that, yet there was nothing I could do. The day she came by to say good-bye was gut wrenching for all of us. When she left, I went back into the house and went to the bedroom she had growing up. I fell on my knees and cried out to God.

I have been a Christian for most of my life, and am thankful for the spiritual roles I saw lived out before me. I was solid in what I had been taught. I had no power, but I knew the One who did. That day as I cried before the Lord, I experienced turely turning lose and completely trusting Him to take care of my daughter. When I stood on my feet, I felt peace in place of fear. And.....He took care of her!

I only share this with you to let you know I hear what you are saying. I know my H had to trust God to take care of me.....and to speak to my heart, b/c he (my H) was not able to do much with me. I know it was very tough. I broke him down. But, long story short, I needed someone to talk to.....but I couldn't talk to anyone I knew......b/c of my EA. So, that led me looking for a support forum.....which led me here. Surprise, surprise!

Some may say that wasn't God and it "just happened". I know I had free will to choose, refuse, or accept. The very people who would say the very words I needed to get in my brain to start waking me up were right here. Instead of rejecting me and throwing stones at me, I was given the frank information I was ignorant about, and began to see the light through the fog. I "could have" had a bunch of LBS's taking their anger out on me. But I didn't, and I believe it was b/c somebody who loved me was praying.

So, you are smart to turn loose and put her in God's hands. But you may need to get out of the way (if you know what I mean). He is dealing with a rebellious W, but He is experienced. Give it time b/c whenever human volition is involved....it usually means they aren't going to make it simple. Keep your eyes on Him, and not on the stitch.

You will get through this, Corbean. And remember something......our time is imperfect, but His time is always perfect.