Roller coaster and then some

[daring]

Some things I've been thinking about.....
I've learned what my main cheese less tunnel is- talking about something related to our relationship that hurts me.
The first " I want a D" bomb happened after I was really bothered by his behavior and talked to him about it. I had no understanding of MLC it DR at that time but learned all I could real quick.
The second time most recently that he said that was after I was upset about an R conversation we had ( that he initiated) and that he was still holding on to a score keeping mentality. I think I just got too comfortable thinking things were better and he was getting better.
Ok - got it- need to treat him like a friend but can't share any hurts related to him- it's too much for him to feel like he's hurting me more.

So on to my next issue right now- he traveled last week and called me every night and even one morning just to check in. Said it was hard being by himself as he focuses on the wrong things and is looking forward to getting back home.
All that is very good I know. But I am feeling irritated and frustrated with him and I'm frustrated with myself for this.
It's like I'm going back through the anger stage again- ugggh!!
I'm also very stressed about some tax issues we have to resolve and some things at work so maybe that's it. But I have got to figure this out because he knows me so well he picks up on every little nuance of my behavior. Luckily I'm away this weekend with my daughter at an event so I've had downtime.
I feel like I am going to have to be a great actress- and at the same time figure out the source of this frustration quick!