Thank you so much Wonka for sharing your experience. It was so reassuring to know that I am not alone in dating foibles after D... it felt like i was going backwards, not forwards, in relational healthiness.. and i like your reframe, that while it does signal strongly things to work on within ourselves, it is also partially a reflection of what we have just been through... thank you.
At first the feelings felt almost as intense as BD, think it was emotional memory...which was so so scary, to think about being in that place again... but they have shifted quickly, i can sleep, eat and function so much better than after BD.. so i am realizing that it is nowhere near the same thing... RELIEF whew..
i just got a card from xw.. with photos from our wedding (union at that time) rehearsal party for out of town guests that she thought i might want of my family.. and wishing me well for my surgery and offering again to help in any way... it is nice to not feel any anger and also not much curiosity.. "isn't it interesting?".. finally i can say those words and mean them... took awhile but i got here
glad to hear that you are dating wonka... keep updating us, i am following in your footsteps and love to see your progress..
Me(f): 51 W: 41 DP:8 M:3 T:10 "W not happy" 7/11 D final: 8/13
