tpaDad..I wanted to address some of the things you asked and I did read you stich. When did you notice a change in your wifes behavior? That was when she started her affair..She could have even just been mentally in it.People in affairs daydream alot that this OP is so great and their spouse doesn't have these qualities blah,blah Do you see ,you brainwash yourself to think this is your ticket to happiness. I thought it noble that you seemed to put alot of the blame on yourself(that you weren't around etc.) but do not beat yourself up! AS for my affair(or shall I say nightmare)we did live together ,split up and then i met my H. So when he called me 10 yrs later to "chat" I didn't think it was a big deal.Wow..I didn't see the train wreak that was to occur! We were friends for a year and then it all changed. I became very distant from my H and he wasn't sure what to make of it.He kept hanging in there thinking things would get better.Anyway to make a long story short now he said we are having a serious talk tommorrow morning and I think the big D is coming.. AS for your W saying she loves this OM she is in LaLa land right now and not in reality at all..
