luvcats, stay focused on your sitch. Keep working on you and make yourself happy. It seems if unhappiness the cause of your A then figure out what made you unhappy and work on that so this doesn't happen again. Read Michele's books and post her often. I would also suggest posting on the newcomers board just because there's more traffic there.
I have a couple of questions for you about your A if you don't mind. I too just recently found out that my W is seeing her ex-bf. This has totally devastated me. She knows that I am aware of this now but has not admitted it. We are suppose to get together this sunday to discuss it. She has offered to answer any questions I have. She has already filed for the D and signed her papers and wants me to sign too. I'm avoiding that right now. You can see my thread on the new comers board: NoD: New and seeking opinions Part 2
My question is why your ex-bf? How long did you two date? Who initiated the contact? How long did it last? My W dated her ex-bf for about 4 years before we started dating. They broke up because he started seeing someone else. She started dating as well. They would get together once in awhile. He then got a job out of state and she was really upset that he didn't ask her to go with her. So, thus their relationship ended. THis 1995. We started dating about 3 months or so after they broke up. 1999, he came into town to visit and they got together. I confronted her about this but she said that they just went out to have a few beers but she lied when I first asked her about it. She hasn't talked to him for a long time but as soon as they did all of the real problems between us started. She moved out and filed. To make matters worse, she has only complained about him for the last nine years about how badly he treated her and how he used to verbally abuse her and she told me that he has hit her in the past. I don't get it?
Sorry this is so long, but I really hoping to get some insight from your A with your ex-bf so maybe I can better understand my W's.
