I learned to hold others accountable for their actions and they should be the ones to apologize. I used to bring it to the attention of the abuser and well, my H wouldn't ever, and I mean ever, admit he had been hurtful and said something he needed to apologize to me for. This is something I'm not accepting yet, and well, it's probably just as well we're apart when the other person can't be repentant of his/her own words and actions. I did read that it's good for us/me to forgive him for not having that capability and well that's what I forgive, not the actual words or action.
