This is where YMMV. With my husband, he takes offense to me not saying a word to him and thinks I'm mad. Be cheerful. Doing a 180 doesn't mean you stop speaking to him altogether if you are living together.

For example: when my H and I would argue, I'd get mad and give him the silent treatment for DAYS. Now, I'm telling him good morning, and hoping he has a nice day. Even after a bad day, even after he says something mean. I tell him good night if we are in the same room and I'm going to bed. I ask him if he's had a good day. Then I let him chat away. If he starts to get into technical lingo, I try not to let my eyes glaze over, and instead ask him to explain things. It usually leads to him asking about my day. I keep it short, simple, and upbeat. My H HATES when I complain about things. If all I did was complain about my day, it would send a bad signal his direction. Instead, I focus on the positives.

That is one of the HARDEST things for me to do. I'm a pessimist (I say a realist) by nature. It's a total 180 for me to find the good in EVERYTHING. So that's a 180 for me.

What I don't do is nag, whine, complain, beg, plead, promise etc. Talk is cheap. Actions speak louder than words.


Me- 29 H - 36
T - 5y M - 2y
D - 11 months
BD#1 June 2013
BD#2 H files 10/28/13
Retrouvaille Nov 13
BD #3 H Files 2nd time 4/22/14
Fires L 7 days later. No court dates set
Supposedly he's moving out?