[LoisB]

I wonder if you feel manipulated Bright because this has turned into such an ordeal?

I've done the same thing. I get my brain and emotions settled for the visit that I'm dreading and, then, Smokey changes the plans again and I have to work through it all again.

Get worked up, start the process of preparation, grieve, feel the spectrum of emotions, settle...AND, do it all over again. 1,2,3...AND 1,2,3...

Maybe work on how to protect yourself from reacting like you do?? I know it's hard. Or, set some boundaries. Tell him that he needs to make a list of everything he wants from the house so the picking up issue isn't an issue anymore.