TL72, There is work to be done by the MLCer before they can return home. They need to prove to the LBS that they are honest, trustworthy and transparent in their relationship w/you. You need to start out as friends, date and go from there. If your h truly wants to return home to you, he will do whatever it takes for you to see that he's a changed man and willing to walk thru fire to make you happy and for you to trust him again, right down to being transparent, i.e., sharing of passwords for phones and computers. He will want you to know where he's going, what he's doing, etc. If he refuses to be transparent w/you or you feel that he's still placing you second in his life, then he's not ready to return home, but that's my opinion.
Also, they return home too soon and haven't completed their journey, at some point, they will leave again and the second time around can be worse than the first time they walked. So, sit back, observe and when the lip service becomes actions and you feel comfortable w/his actions and he's proven trustworthy, then it's time for him to return home. Until then, allow him to swing in the wind to allow all of the cobwebs to leave his heart, mind and soul.
I'm going to suggest that you do a search for reachingHigher's threads and you will see the work that both she and her husband did to become a reconciled and successful couple.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
