How do you do THIS part...

[labug]

SP, I haven't posted to you for quite a long time, mostly because I kept hearing the same thing, you know whoever is posting to you is right, you're better, things aren't bad, you don't see that you need counseling, or can't afford it and then BAM!, you're right back where you started. It's a repetitive cycle and I know from my experience how hard it is to break that.

But it can be done.

I'm going to throw this out there for you to think about-I'm not so sure you're controlling your emotions. I think you're stuffing them and then something happens which creates the BAM! I mentioned above and you're right back to anger. For me being in control of my emotions means I recognize what I'm feeling, fear, anger, pain, hurt, why I'm feeling it and taking the time to figure out what I can do about it, if anything. Sometimes we just need time for the emotion to pass. When our head is clouded by emotion we rarely make good decisions.

You know I've followed your story from the beginning and I hope you come out of this with a better understanding of you.