Dealing with an ongoing affair

[PeterV2]

Indigo1, thank you for the advice and hopefully message. Today we had a Mother's Day lunch at the Keg and had a lot of laughs. W, me, mum, D & SIL. Then we went to SIL's mum's place for a visit and then W, Mum & I went for a nice drive in the countryside. Dropped W & mum off at the RH and came home.
W called me up and hung on the phone as long as she could. Before the end of the call she said she really liked holding me the other day. I told her I liked it too. I think she's starting to come around, but like you & Sandi2 say, I need to be strong and insist that the OM is out of her head, that a transparency plan is in place and that she is willing to get MC before she moves back home.
Tomorrow we're going to take her mum to get her ticket back to S.Africa. It'll be another day spent with her & her mum. I'm totally supporting her mum's situation and W really is appreciative of that. We had a heart to heart phone conversation tonight. Talked about a lot of things. But no mention of remorse for the A. Still waiting for that. I'm not saying "I love you" anymore. Still struggling to stay detached. I must stay detached until I have definitive proof that the OM is out of the picture. True what you say: I know when she's lying and when she's seeing him. We've been together long enough that I just know when things aren't right. But I haven't had that feeling in the past week, so maybe she was right when she said her A was over. Still I don't trust her and I need to get the transparency plan in place. Thank you for your support & advice. It truly is appreciated from all of you on this forum. This is indeed the hardest thing I've done in my life.