KdogGS Journey Part V- Settlement

[KdogGS]

Our mediation was going to be much more expensive, $1k per side. I think the costs, coupled with it being on her birthday made her cave. I can't express how much birthdays mean to her, like she did something monumental by being born.

Anyway, I've already taken steps to refinance the house into my name alone, and am putting her requested items in the garage. I plan to get the locks re-keyed before she comes over to pick up her remaining belongings so she can't get inside the house. I will be classy and put all of her stuff neatly and cleaned in the garage. It will be my final loving act towards her, I don't feel that I have anything more to give.

I have no idea if Db'ing and LRT had any effect on her. In some regards, we have much less closure than other people's situations. That's just how mine played out I guess. I don't think the door is still open anymore if she were to change her mind. I couldn't ever put myself through this again, and I need an independent woman who can think for herself and be open-minded about things. While we should respect our parents, they shouldn't run our lives, and they aren't always right.

I know that I've gained great relationship tools to move forward with, I am just concerned about my selection ability. I thought I had a woman that would stand by me through it all. When I needed her she bailed. I'll have a hard time trusting again. I also will have a hard time sharing finances. I loved being the provider before and plugging money away, but she really used that against me in the divorce. She had laughed prior to our marriage when I mentioned a prenup, back when "divorce wasn't in her vocabulary." I know now to protect myself moving forward, that people change and talk is cheap.

I still wouldn't wish this on anyone, and will take awhile to come to grips with my new reality.