BM - this email is the voice of emotional abuse talking. It focuses on His feelings and Your actions. What I have learned is to keep a steady drip drip of Their actions and My feelings resulting from this.
So any response to your xh focuses on how you feel and felt as a result of what he did. [If you didn't pick up on Portia's reference to soulmate schmoopies - you just need to gooogle it - it reminds you how crazy these people really are. It isn't you it is him.)
There are many responses to that rude and entitled email, but I would not defend myself at all, but just keep the focus on his actions and how you feel. They like to play the blame game.
The other thing that abusers fail to do which is related, is not take ANY responsibility for the state of affairs, but play the victim. An emotionally 'normal' person who does something hurtful tries to put things right, and see the other person's point of view, even if they do not agree.
BM I think it is amazing that you are so positive to your girls. This man is a MLC jerk - we all see variations on the same script - lazy selfish and entitled.
Deep down I suspect he knows he is wrong from beginning to end, but if he admits even a particle of responsibility that would shatter the whole house of cars he has built.
