When H first left I was very forthcoming about my role and responsibilty in our sitch. I apologized and took ownership. But now, months later, I have even more insights. (Something occurred to me during our mediation meeting, and other things I've realized since our S).
We haven't talked about our R since at least mid-Feb. When, if ever, might it be appropriate to bring up the new insights I've had about what went wrong (and what I would do differently?) Maybe y'all need more details to give me an answer, but I would love some thoughts. I am so tempted to reach out.
It's so bizarre-- he is in a rush to get the home appraised so we can deal with that, and figure out financials-- and he thinks we need a mediator for that... but the parenting plan we should be able to just figure out ad hoc over email? *blink* *blink blink*. Words of wisdom appreciated...
First, read Crimson's latest threads if you want to see how, even with a court ordered plan, custody can get sticky. Being different doesn't mean you back down on your rights as a parent. I don't have personal experience with this but it seems that most people do better with a set plan and exercising flexibility when possible.
Your child is very young. Her needs are going to be different now than a 6 or 8 or 10yr old.
About the insights, ask yourself why you would want to bring them up. What is your motive?
Me 57/H 58 M36 S 2.5yrs R 12/13
Let me give up the need to know why things happen as they do. I will never know and constant wondering is constant suffering. Caroline Myss
