I think I belong here #3

[Georgiabelle]

Hi Praying,

I know many of us can relate. We hate to see our children suffer and that is where it is so difficult. We don't want them to suffer, so we shield and comfort them as much as possible. Remember that your h must own that relationship with his kids.

Sorry-mini hijack coming. I know it is so difficult to believe we married this person. It's almost ludicrous to think this is the same man, right? When I see my h, I cannot believe this is the man who went to every prenatal appointment with me and slept in my room the entire time after my 3 c-sections. This same man whose top priority is spending time with his gf who is a college student 45 minutes away. But it is him. I think my point is, after a time, it is still incomprehensible. However, the shock and feeling of "is this true?" lessens after a time.

I think I've shared before that I didn't know people blew up their families this way. I'm rather worldly and have travelled a great deal, but I didn't know that people just left marriages because "they didn't want them to work" or they " just wanted to date other people.." I've seen many divorces, affairs , high conflict marriages, etc. I've seen many people work through affairs. I know affairs are generally always a part of this. I don't know. I think after BD, I was shocked but still *knew * my h would want us to work because divorce wasn't an option. That was a big deal to both of us as his parents have been together 47 years and mine were 51 until my dad 'a unexpected death last. My h says I'm never wrong. I couldn't have been more wrong in my thinking.

You will be okay. As a matter of fact, you will and can be fantastic. Your children will be okay. Mine will be doing the divorce care sessions when they start up in August. Focus on you and the kids. Just let him go. Easier said than done.

Hug your kids a few extra times this weekend. You will both appreciate it.