Maybe they mean that you cannot control your spouses actions? Not sure. I do read a lot of wishy-washy advise on here. Advice that advocates sitting back and waiting for the world to change in your favor while you "improve yourself". I don't subscribe to that at all. I think you've got to take charge of your destiny- and that includes your M.
Both Starsky and I and others on here SAVED our marriages by being direct with our spouses and setting boundaries. You can't control your W, but you can control what YOU will accept in YOUR life. The funny thing is- standing up for what's right also makes you more attractive to your W....
