First off, sorry that you are here, then again, I'm sorry that any of us are here...
Although it is truly the best, worst place to be in....
A little more information of yourself would be cool too....
Maybe add your info to your Signature line ??
Originally Posted By: RS
Me- 49 male stunned and lost W- 47 female ,stunning and my world Kid - 15 son ,better than anyone could ask for dated 11 years ,married 18. Bomb-4-3-2014; we should move on separately.4-18-2014- "I don't want to be married"
A couple hits though.....
WAS's lie......period
WAS's typically project their feelings onto the person closest to them...
WAS's...typically cheat on their spouses....not all, but the majority of the time.
To get through this, you will need to understand that YOU are the only person that you can do anything about....
Don't spend this time that SHE needs, pining away waiting for her..
Do for you and your boys....Always
Take care of YOU.....good friend of mine told me once, If you don't make yourself Number one...You can't be that for your children....
Realize that you can do everything "right" and there is no gaurantee that you will come out the other side with a restored marriage with her....
What WILL happen is that you will realize that YOU will come out the other side of this a better man.
Take the time to understand what you are dealing with , and then do the work for yourself.....Strive to be better everyday....
Don't snoop....the only person you will hurt is you.....
Don't ring any bells that can't be un-rung
Don't put a timeline on this....there is none except hers....
Don't think there is something YOU can do to change this path for her...
You're never gonna talk your way out of something you acted your way into...
Time...Patience...Understanding....and being real...
Those are your friends right now....Your best friends...
Give plenty of space
Do for you
Do for your children
Understand your role right now to get through this....
One day at a time....One hour at a time....and in the beginning?
One minute at a time...
Don't talk to family and friends about this either, you will only hurt you.....
Come here to vent and understand, there is NOTHING you can say that will shock any of us man....
I have always said that I wouldn't wish this onto my worst enemy....at first I meant because of the hurt....Now ?
Because I wouldn't want him to be as good of a man than I ....
What is gained through this , is far more than what is lost.
You are going to be on moderation for a while, do not let it stop you from reading and posting though....
Eventually, you will come off of moderation and your posts will show up "real time"....
I would also recommend that you read through some of the MLC forum too...
For now, breathe, eat, and get plenty of rest buddy...
Read the 37 rules (that Rick63 is gonna link up shortly), and follow them.
