Spoue tried I didn't, now opposite #2

[whytry]

Thanks MrCas. Y'all are both hitting the nail on the head. And the 3 sides to everything is definitely how our last few years have been. When I shut down I didn't hardly speak to anyone and obviously it was due to the shame. Not sure either side of our families had a clue except what W told them. She's honest as hell but still very opinionated.

I do now know how long my in laws have been giving advice and obviously like book, they always think they are protecting their child. My children have slipped up saying what goes on when they visit and S13 has really been hurt by it. I'm not saying they are wrong by any stretch but it's obvious it's affecting my kiddos. Truth be told my mom would take my W over me but as I said before my mom lived what my W went through and D my dad. She tried to reach out to W (this is what W told me) but W I'm sure assumes it's a plea to hang on. I'm not even sure my mom would have that opinion after the last 5 years.

And I agree I'm broken inside like you mention. I relive those painful places every day but use them as inspiration to keep my focus. I can see the beauty in life now compared to those times.

OK, this wasn't a negative reflection on M, just trying to fill in the blanks hoping it helps y'all. For every bad memory, I can give 10 amazing memories that everyone (me, W, & family) is/has ignored or forgotten.