Biggus Dickus: Part 2

[LoisB]

25, thanks for your all your thoughts. I promise, I'm taking all of them to heart.

I did go to inpatient co-dependency treatment in my 20's to work on some of these deep issues. Beat on the pillows, screamed, all that jazz. I will, though, look at what you are suggesting.

I know I was interested in Retrovaille at one point, but Smokey wasn't.

I really don't feel I could work any harder or deeper on my childhood issues. I think I've done about all there is to do.

I do, however, think my feelings will lead me out of this if I listen to them without judging myself. And, some of that is actually the stinky feelings. I get stuck in the stinkin thinkin so easily. I need to separate the feelings from the thoughts and seek the source of the bad feelings.

BTW, your d can help you out at home while she's there, but HER life is her job and I'd be wary of counting on her for supporting the household with a job.

If I gave the impression that I expect her to help support my household, it wasn't intended. I do, however, have some expectations about her contributing to her cell phone ($50 per month) and her one prescription which is $80 per month. I won't have her pay all the script, but she can help. Up to this point, I've carried these things for her.

She has had a glorious year, socially, at school. :-) No part-time job and the ability to enjoy her sorority and friends and some much-needed re-awakenings of all the FUN that life can offer. It's time to take on some more responsibility now. I can't continue helping with her extras.

I was clear last summer that I wouldn't pay for any sorority expenses. AND, I told her she needed to achieve a 3.0 for me to continue helping her with spending money and paying the cell phone and the other non-essentials.

This past year, I have put my own finances in jeopardy trying to help her and that's why I feel so strongly about her working this summer and possibly fall. She hasn't gotten the grades or achieved the credit hours I would have liked.

She got a 2.9 last semester and had to drop one course because she was failing. Then, she re-took the course and may have to take an incomplete or get a D. NOT COOL.

Yes, she was sick this semester. I get that. But, she has about 15 completed credit hours after a year of school. Her grade point is up in the air because of the unfinished material.

She was depressed around mid-term and I got her to the doc to get some medication. I also pushed her to go to college counseling.

I don't know what's going to happen. I know I'm disappointed with her academics and financial contribution.