living with WAW who hasn't walked yet (4)

[dingo]

Tell her why you're going dark/dim and then do it. Its that simple. She then knows that your actions are in that context because you've told her. If she denies, do the hand thing that Starsky mentioned and walk away.

You are in her head ENTIRELY too much and are following a long chain of causes and effects that are fabricated solely in yours. You have no idea if she wants the phone password so she can scrutinize your activity. You have no idea if she's going to say 'see he never loved me'.

Has it ever occurred to you that she knows exactly what she's doing? That she is playing you like a fiddle because your inconsistent actions have showed her that continuing to deny things is keeping you right where she wants you? Why don't you try being consistently dim/dark and see what happens. What is your alternative? To crawl around through her purse looking for her underwear?