Honestly, she doesn't know why I've gone dim in LRT. Even though the thought of me is revolting to her, she is clueless as to why I've been scarce. She seems to have never connected that my actions are related to her A, because she thinks she has pulled it off. If I go dim, she says I'm being mean. If I say good night, she thinks I'm being nice. She's having a freaking A, she has to know that I know, but she thinks I have some kind of mental disorder because I seem to treat her differently from week to week.
You are totally confusing me, Zew. Just a couple of posts ago, you told us that you've done the "STOP IT -- we both know you're lying to me right now" thing, and told her that you know she's having an affair. Now you say "she has no idea why I've gone dim," and you cast some doubt as to whether or not you know.
Jeezus, you're making this thing complicated. Give her the "I know all about you and ______, so stop lying to me" speech once and for all if you want, but I'm about 99% sure that she knows that you know and she simply doesn't care right now.
And no holier-than-thou speech from you is going to MAKE her care! You are trying to present a "cure" to someone who doesn't even admit that they are ill, and even if she did, YOU would be the LAST PERSON (in her current frame of mind( that she would want bringing her the antidote.
You continue to try to come up with a way to present you "this is what it would take" dealbreakers, when she hasn't come to you and asked back into the marriage.
