Loualea I didn't start this....

[LuckyLuke]

I suspect your husband is feeling guilty and conflicted...

I would enjoy the good interaction you get, but don't count on anything, as the WAS has a personal devil to deal with (and it's not you).

Congrats on the racing - it can be so much fun, depending on the place and organization (there is a race here with live music every few km, for example) - I found having a goal outside love and marriage very good - started to cook a lot, for example - maybe you can identify something similar for you.

Gratitude today is for sound, be it music, or the human voice, or birds - there are so many here early in the morning, before the traffic gets going; the bite of an electric guitar, the sometimes palpable presence in (particularly) female singer voices.

Perhaps you could think about alternative things to do, w/o husband, when he is there and being rotten. You do not have to hang around someone who maltreats you or is not pleasant to be with.

Luke