4th Down And Getting A Little Anxious

[Georgiabelle]

Thanks everyone. I appreciate the feedback from everyone. This board has so many amazing people sharing stories and advice.

I know I have issues with intimacy and emotionally opening up to people. I think I do well being open with my kids, however I have struggled with these issues in both of my long term relationships (totaling 19 years ).

Eric, you are right on the logic aspect. This is something I couldn't put my finger on for years. Due to the nature of the work I do, I have taken every intelligence and personality test imaginable. Please note, that I don't think these are the end all be all but they can be interesting and insightful. About a year and a half ago, I had the most intensive testing ever. When the results came back for this company, they actually go over them with you. I had something that came up as very unusual. I am extremely intuitive and OPERATE highly on logic. As a result of that, although I can get along with anyone, I cannot relate to how apparently 98% of the population operates. Maybe this sounds confusing or hokey, but as soon as I heard this it was like a "so that's why that is" moment. I can't explain it. I guess I feel like most people seem "out of control" (bad thinking as expressing your emotions can be very healthy) with the way they operate. I realize operating solely on logic is not healthy. However, I'm not sure how to change that. Gotta keep digging.

I think I have some work today before my next relationship and I'm willing to try to figure my stuff out. However, I'm grateful for good health, wonderful kids, friends, a nice career, and to be here. I will get there.