WR, I'm sorry to hear this, but I'm not surprised that he's come back at you. Generally, when they are nice, they either want something to want to stick it to you. In your h's case, he's still hot that you went to overseas on your working trip. He doesn't realize that your company wasn't providing you a luxury vacation, but you were actually working. Silly, man.
Here are my thoughts on his claims. If he was having difficulty at work, it's not because of you, but because of him and his crisis. He wasn't about the use the free counseling service because he wants to play the victim and doesn't care who he takes down and how much it costs in the end. Also, you need to be on your toes, by him claiming he's making less money, he may very well come in and try to get you to pay him spousal support. Yep, you read it right.
If I were hit w/this type of nonsense, I would call him on his bluff and go to court. It's time to end this BS and allow you and your sons to get on w/your lives. BTW, if it goes to court, how is he paying his lawyer and court costs?
Do not allow this man to know he's upset you. It's all about control and being vindictive because of envy and jealousy. He's not happy, therefore you shouldn't be either.
Get your ducks in a row and be ready to meet w/your lawyer on Monday.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
