[ces67]

"May need a bit of help with this one since right now W seems to be only interested in discussing logistical items. Later Sunday evening I tried to ask her about the morning and she cut me off mid-sentence saying it is not a big deal. Tone very much indicated she did not want to talk about it further...."

Maybe the work for you here is figuring out what your 180 is and doing it? I've lived that scenario many times over the past 4 years. Body language & tone clearly do not match the words of "its not a big deal".

Just a suggestion to consider. Even if she's not willing to talk about it, maybe you can still say what you need to say. Even if its not a big deal to her, let her know it is a big deal to you and why (maybe because you care about her?). What if you just stated your view of how you look back on the morning and what you wish you'd done differently. Don't expect any response or support, but it may be a small way to show your trying to learn her and then follow it up with a changed behavior. Little items like this over and over. And don't assume it will be the same item over and over. Also, keep the wording on your own thoughts and behaviors and away from hers. This is your learning process.

It still may not work (and I can attest to that) but it may help you become more of who you want to be.