I declare myself "Survived" ! (VI)

[Positivespin]

Yes I do......I need to continue working on my "nice guy" BS and be D4's father

Sat will be a co-parent test for me as its D4's first ballet recital. My parents will be attending and it will be their first time seeing X in over a year....My mother is still pissed, feels like she needs to "share her feelings". I clearly explained that there will be consequences if she does.

After the accident I went to see my doctor for help with the back spasims, as he was feeling around he tells me I have a hernia and refers me to a surgeon.....swell:(

I see the surgeon and now I have a date (pretty shippy date). On May 21 I go under the knife for the first time and it scares the hell out of me.

It also makes me confront one of my original fears head on. I will be alone recovering. No loved one to take me home and check in on me. My mother was all to eager to jump up and volunteer but ive finally made progress on laying down boundaries and her being around will challange those newly laid parameters.

Being a virgo im also VERY critical of my appearance. My list of issues critical of me is long,scaring is just another item.

The spasims have also GREATLY reduced my exercise as I was really starting to look good for the summer. Ive changed my routine but the fact that i had tracked success in pushups and situps from bomb drop was a esteem build for me in terms of seeing progress in a clear way (reps). Goals are being redrawn again.

Im frustrated at the unexpected bump in the road. Ive never had back stiffness in the morning- Im whiny Ill get over it and continue to move FORWARD!

Hell, its better than D4 and I Dead!