Don't know what to think

[LoisB]

Hey TB,

I hope you are feeling better. :-)

I headed back to the office to finish the re-fi papers and did fine. Got home, wrote a poem about it, and broke down. I know I am just grieving for the man I used to know because that guy I saw today? He's not the guy I married. It's almost like looking at a corpse - you recognize the face, but the life spirit of the person is gone. That's how I felt when I looked at him. 'He' was no longer in that body.

Here's my poem:
My eyes look into yours with disbelief and sadness,
Your eyes stare back with barely a glimmer of what I once was to you.
My heart breaks into its final last pieces.
Your heart has no memory of me.

I think your poem and your thoughts are beautiful. I balled reading them. Lol.

I know the legal process is just "paper" and I know a divorce doesn't necessarily mean it's over... Still, ever since I retained an attorney and had him start working on papers...I've been kinda, sorta a mess. The grief and fear and all of it rose to the surface again.

Please be gentle with yourself. It's ok to be a mess sometimes. Sometimes being a mess means you are working through it and your soul is trying to clean it all up.

:-) I hope you enjoy some of the weekend.