I'm really grateful to everyone who has been posting and help me recently. Thank you for the support and encourage and kick in the pants.

I think I've had a whole lotta crud hit the fan at once (pneumonia, preparing to file, a few new secrets about Smokey, D19 pneumonia, school year ending, tuition payments ending, summer coming/need for money, D19 college issues, D19 coming home, etc...) and it's just been maybe the thing I needed to truly face some scary things about myself. I'm choosing to see this is as exactly what God wants. He wants me to face some things head on and with help.

Smokey was my safety net and appears to have some gaping holes that I ignored for a decade or two. Ouch.

For awhile there, I was trying desperately to sew up the holes...Smokey just wouldn't sit still though! Now, I'm facing the net is broken beyond repair and I need to create my own net. Scary shid for a gal who never thought she could do it.

Past is Past.

"You know, it's times like these when I realize what a superhero I am." Tony Stark/Iron Man

“Focus on what you can do, then do it with all your heart.” Lois Wilson