Started a new thread. I think the old one is almost on lockdown. Previous thread
Been doing some thinking tonight. I keep feeling confused about something-- I know I'm supposed to give my WAH space-- no R talk, no pursuing. I don't ask him about his plans, I don't ask him much about his friends. I don't return texts or emails right away unless they are urgent about our D. I have made myself very scarce in his life.
But, then I also thought I was supposed to make the most out of every interaction we DO have, and experiment with little things to see if they have a positive effect. How do I do that without seeming like I'm pursuing? I've tried light things-- complimenting his parenting, noticing a new outfit, bringing up some current events I'm sure he is interested in. When I speak to him warmly and enthusiastically, and he barely responds, or responds as a polite acquaintance, I feel foolish. Like I am pursuing someone who has already rejected me-- how lame.
How do I know that my actions are not considered pursuing? How long is long enough to wait before we start experimenting. How do I detach and give him space while also trying to show him a vision of what our (happy) future could be like?
