1. I am willing to agree to your request in relation to public holidays. I've had a crack at it (see attached). The key reasons I've made the choices are:
•I wanted to make sure one of us didn't have D2's company on both Easter and Christmas in the same year (and the other not to have either). •D2 was with me for Christmas Day last year so I have proposed she would be with you this year. •I felt the person who misses out on D2's company over Christmas should look after her over New Year.
2. In relation to weekends when you have D2 to stay:
•To make it easier for you, I am willing to agree to a presumption that you don't drive up to the [place 2.5 hours away] but rather drop her here [in the same city where W also lives at least 3 days each week]. •I am willing for you to bring D2 back after her dinner, so that she is with you for the full weekend, from Friday until Sunday evening.
3. You may be the first choice babysitter. I am not promising that in every single instance I will ask you, but that can be the presumption.
4. On the weeks when D2 is not going to be staying with you, you may take her to lunch on one of her Penguin [the creche] days. You may not have her overnight on a normal, operational week night. This is in part because I want her to be settled but, more importantly, it is because a) particularly with respect to something as precious and vulnerable as a young child, years of seriously mistreating me (including involving D2 and mistreating me in her presence) cannot be countered in just over a year and b) in any event, based on my last two interactions with you I am doubtful that meaningful change has taken place. As noted in my last emails, you took my recent approach as personal criticism and went on the attack, upsetting me in public and later over the phone. I have no evidence that you considered seriously, for any period of time at all, the points I was making. Rather, you appeared to focus on how you could counter my points and discredit what I was saying.
As you can see, I have agreed to everything you have asked for (and gone significantly further, in relation to your weekends with D2) except where I have serious and valid concerns. In the latter instance, I have nevertheless offered a compromise.
