Sometimes I think happiness is one's attitude, for example, though my w and d16 left unexpectedly yesterday, I had a friend call and we went running/riding together, and then I saw Die andere Heimat last night, something I'd been wanting to do.
My employer pays us to be healthy, and we can get bonus points for certain activities. I think that this month I will try the "keep a daily gratitude journal", as I understand it is good to do so.
(I should also tell you that my W used to call me Louis or Lou, way back, in her tender, loving, days. I have always liked the name).
You need to let your feelings out. When I went to EE I really did, surrounded by people who listened and cared and supported me. I can remember stabbing my notebook (everyone gets one) with my pen, I was so angry, so hurt, so trespassed upon. If you can go to there or to a similar place, I would highly recommend it.
I also learned the value of a journal, a receptacle for my pain, always waiting.
Write, draw, paint, learn boxing, do yoga, get outside.
Gentleness and not attacking and giving, though not to excess (I am glad when my W brings me a cup of tea, for example, though even that has been a while), would help. My W is quick to anger, quick to attack, judgmental, all of which turn me off fast. I want respect and not scorn or rejection. Look at yourself - are you any of these? What did your H love about you when you first met? Have you lost adventure and novelty?
Does your husband like to walk? Spaziergaenge can be quite good at healing...
Read your husband a book - W and I read Watership Down to each other, a long time ago, wonderful.
Take care - I will be online sporadically for this month - Luke
M58, xW54 S22, D18 M 1984, D 2016 Living a new life.
