At one point on time, I thought about hiring a PI as well. (Remember that, Job?) Job is right, be ready to shell out some big bucks. I wanted to do it to prove to my H what I already knew was true - that he was having an affair with my friend.
I didn't end up doing it, and I am very glad. I remember thinking - wow, that is a lot of money! My H had already spent so much of our money, I didn't want to waste any more on their affair. I thought the money would be better spent on our children.
The other thing to think about, and this is a big one... Specifically what do you plan to do with the info once you get it? If your h is truly in MLC, any proof isn't likely to bring him around. Instead, he will use it against you, use it to vilify you - "you spied in me!" See what I mean?
You have asked a few times- if both you and your h are detached, how does that work?
I like visuals, they help me. Early on, someone gave me this visual... Imagine that during your H's MLC, you and he are on two parallel journeys. You many cross paths one day, you may not. Hopefully, you will. But it will take a long time to get to that point.
GAL is the key to detaching. Something else that really helped me was to remember that the person doing all these hurtful and selfish things was not my h, not the man I married. If you can remember this, it does help.
Detachment doesn't mean you don't care. It just means you don't let what he says and does dictate what you say and do.
Follow your own path
Bomb January 2012 - doesn't feel the same about me
~ "There is nothing love cannot face; there is no limit to its faith, hope, and endurance."
