She left - 4

[gogofo]

I wanted her to be jealous and sad in the hopes that it would make her want to work on us. Probably sounds dumb but I wanted it to show her the things I care about and that I am someone only a fool would leave. It was an attempt to spur her into action. With her saying she does not know one way or another about fixing us and asking me what would be different I feel like I need to show her the differences.

It is about me feeling hurt in this situation with her being gone. I feel she has taken a lot from our family since leaving, even though she left because of my actions. Just really mad at her yesterday, something I haven't felt in quite a while.

This is not who I want to be but with her being a WAW I cannot have a healthy discussion about us and my feelings. I think it goes against the whole BDing theories.

Right now, as of writing this, I would not do it again because the motivation was out of hurt not love.

Past interactions had me feeling hurt and overwhelmed and doing nothing. I did not lash out in anger. If I had we may have dealt with the issues. I avoided confrontation in the R. I was scared an argument would drive her away. Ha! That worked well.