It is interesting how people some people are against telling the OM's W about the A while others are for it. I read an interesting perspective by a PHD on another site explaining that an A needs secrecy to thrive. He recommends immediate exposure of the A to everyone, especially the OM's W, because it typically stops the A dead in it's tracks. True reconcilliation cannot begin until the A ends.
Sure enough, I did not follow this advice and my strategy allowed the A to continue. I think I'm going to expose the A to the OM's W next week. After all, I gave both my W and the OM multiple chances to do the right thing and it blew up in my face. I'm just trying to end the A (or at least make it harder for the OM to meet my W). I'm not doing this out of spite or revenge. I've thought a lot about it and I think it makes sense in my case. The A is a threat to my M and I can't truly start to heal until the A ends.
