Thanks so much for the responses. Amazingly I finally have a boundary, and I am not budging because he hit MOMMA BEAR! So far we are good. I am going to be taking the kids out soon. I told him what we were doing and he is welcome to come. H will drag his feet as usual and say he is coming last minute (it is the control thing - whatever.)
Thanks so much for the reading suggestions. I don't know why but reading about this whole mess calms me - I think that is weird. My IC is running out of things to give me to read. She has given me 3 to 4 books to read every week and I come back saying done - I want more. Some of the books I have bought my own copy after reading the libraries. DB and DR are those - my therapist actually had me read them early on. And of coarse I keep rereading them. I wish that I had known about the website back then - oh well.
Thanks for those that helped me through my panic. I have not had one of those panic attacks in a couple of months. I belong to 2 forums and everyone said I was right in setting this boundary - makes me feel better.
H did monster today and I stood my ground again. We will see I have to get thru today and tomorrow before I know that he is listening. H has always mowed over my decsisions.
I have not told him not to talk about OW because I don't want to make a big deal of it. H is still claiming they are just friends. However, I am wondering what is up - he was over there everynight for like 6 weeks and now in the last week he has come home right after work 3 times. I think the longer I can keep it on the downlow the better. H won't fess up about OW anyhow bc of work...dumb A. H tells me very little about OW and family. Maybe 2 things a week - he is pretty hush hush about it. And dipstick just went in the garage to make a phone call - what a maroon! Do you think it is ok for now to not say don't talk about her and her family?
THANKS AGAIN I REALLY APPRECIATE MY NEW FOUND FRIENDS!!! The only thing that would make it better is if some of you lived nearby.
