We are getting along great. We have agreed to not allow anything to escalate. She knows not to talk about OM in front of me. If she does I ask her to,stop. We also agree that we need too take breaks from each other on the weekends, and we can do our own things without notifying the other except for the protection of S15 or each other's well being.
We are still very close to each other and don't want to worry.
I have asked her to refrain from speaking g to OM in the home with the exception of the weekends since during the week she can do it from work.
She is also focusing on me and S15 when we are together.
We had dinner out tonight. There was a nice looking fella about ten years older out with his wife.
He could not keep his eyes off my wife and his wife knew it.
At one point I gave him the man look...when he finally figured out the look, I realized that we should be able to give each other a "look" when the other violates a boundary.
W 53 H 51, S 16, S 21 33 years M 28 DD 3 Feb 11, 2014 S21 and His Fiancée move in with us 8/14 http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...965#Post2477965
So we were watching TV together and I was massaging her shoulder. She fell to sleep snoring slightly. Her snores were rocking me to sleep. I had not fallen to sleep in the Sam bed as her for months.
Next thing I knew I was dreaming that I had tracked down the hotel we were in and basically started to beat the other guy to a pulp, somehow just as INS was at the door I woke up. Kissed her goodnight on the cheek and went to bed..
Is this as weird as it looks...
W 53 H 51, S 16, S 21 33 years M 28 DD 3 Feb 11, 2014 S21 and His Fiancée move in with us 8/14 http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...965#Post2477965
Yes, it is as weird as it looks. Where is your self-respect? Seriously, man. Stop this. Massaging her shoulder? Are you kidding me? How is that detaching? She is walking across you as if your name is "doormat" and you allow it. Go to dinner with her and your son. Then go to your own space. Stop giving her everything when she is schtuping another man! You have control. Act like it.
Me:35 Him:37 Together 8+ yrs Married:7+ years 2 DS's 5 and 2 BD 2/24/14 H living in parents guest house
Drove up to My Son together. It was an interesting drive
No Boundries were crossed
We did hold hands at times. She is still my wife.
W 53 H 51, S 16, S 21 33 years M 28 DD 3 Feb 11, 2014 S21 and His Fiancée move in with us 8/14 http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...965#Post2477965
I thought that those boundries were around talking about OM and what caused our problems.
Are you saying that I should not massage her sore shoulder? I mean a friend of mine was massaging my knee when I was complaining that it hurt after working out,
I am confused maybe as to what boundries to reinforce. Maybe have to go back and reread the book boundries.
The one thing that throws me off is how our marriage COUNSELORS used to tell me to maintain physical contact...
W 53 H 51, S 16, S 21 33 years M 28 DD 3 Feb 11, 2014 S21 and His Fiancée move in with us 8/14 http://www.divorcebusting.com/forums/ubb...965#Post2477965
