Still hung up on this huh? Moving forward how about explaining how you SAVED your marriage? I mean this is a marriage saving website.
You're the one who is "hung up." I am entitled to disagree re: what emotional abuse is. Jesus, could you be any more patronizing?
And, I already told you how I did it. I detached, went dark, removed myself from his life and left him alone to do whatever he would do. I didn't cry, beg, grovel, etc. I didn't ask any pathetic questions such as, "why?' or "who is she?" or anything like that. The only communication we had was for financial or legal issues.
I accepted that our M was over, took a new job and moved more than 100 miles away, not telling him where. And he did try to find out.
In other words, since he didn't want me anymore, I made sure he couldn't have me on any level. This made him think about us and it made him miss me. He lost interest in his ow and split from her 18 months after their wedding. He told me I was so different from her, so he found out on his own the grass was far from greener. He said that he felt such shame and sorrow, and massive guilt for all the pain he caused.
I can't stress enough how important it is to just leave them alone with their decision. Getting in their face with a million questions is not at all helpful. It just irritates them and delays, or kills, any chance of recovery.
