It's good to journal your feelings. I could have written many of those thoughts as my h just wants to be done as well.
You are right. You can't change this as they are looking for the external to make them happy. I know that is crazy but that's what they do. They are so convinced that it's everything in their current life making them unhappy that a new gf, place, friends will finally make them happy.
One thing that I have realized, is that I am building this unique bond with my kids that I can't describe. Yes, it is difficult if I just need to run to the store and all 3 must go with me, but you learn to appreciate things differently. You can do this and your children will see what an amazing mother they have. Their father will have to own all that goes along with his decisions and it won't be pretty. However, that's on your h-not you. There is something about when you come to that realization that makes you feel at peace. Why? I don't know. Maybe because it's not yours to own.
Tomorrow is a new day. Be kind to yourself
3 kids BD 12/15/13 (IDKIILY. ) Rope dropped Cirque du Soleil style D final 9-9-14 "Some people are born on 3rd base and go through life thinking they hit a triple." Barry Switzer
