Wow. I have, at one time or another written very a similar story amigo. I feel for ya.
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But, I really think that once she gets thru the tunnel, once she tries on all the new and "shiny" "things" and none of them bring her the lasting happiness she craves, she will come back to be more like the person she was.
If it helps, I'm 6-7 years past BD and as recently as last night, I see no change in her attitude or the attitude of OM (H now). She is still trying to create drama, anger, angst, etc. He's trying to cause some of that as well, and at one point I heard much of what you're saying you've heard. I have a similar personality as yours from what you describe.
My point? She might at some point figure things out. She might. But it's not likely that will happen in your lifetime or at least during the part of your lifetime where you still care.
AJ
"Our lives begin to end the day we become silent about things that matter" MLK Put the glass down... "Yesterday I was clever so I wanted to change the world Today I am wise, so I am changing myself."
