I'm in, Wife's Out - Pt. Two

[trc2009]

Time will tell Puffy. My hardest thing through all of this is the constant worry of what my W is doing and/or thinking. She was so cryptic before and during our separation. The whole "an alien took my wife" type of thing.

There has been tons of water under the bridge. And that's not something either of us can get over quickly. Both of us said and did things that we would never think the other would say/do. Fortunately, there hasn't been a PA on either of our parts. As I mentioned it's possible that my W has been having an EA but the reality is that it will likely never turn into a PA while we are married. If we get divorced, it's obviously something that can never be ruled out so I can't really think about that. At that point I'll move on and I assume she'll move on at some point as well.

It all comes down to trust. Do I trust my W enough to believe that she legitimately is trying to save our marriage? Or is she just eating her cake until she is financially able to be on her own? One thing I've learned about my W through all of this is that she is a pro at acting like she's happy and content while holding back what she is really thinking. She seems good right now. Happy that we're under the same roof and working on having a functional marriage again. But I also wouldn't be surprised to see her do an about-face in a month or two and claim that she doesn't think things are going to work.

Until the "affection" part of our marriage returns, I'm approaching everything with quite a bit of cynicism. I still try to believe none of what she says and half of what I see. And that's really hard because I want to trust her.