Upwards - Moving Fowards, Tiny Positive Steps

[Upwards]

Truly hit rock bottom today, damn it hurt a lot, just wish I had a big OFF button today. I'm exhausted, totally & utterly exhausted and it's finally caught up on me and I've admitted defeat.

H's been very supportive today although clearly found it difficult at times too seeing the pain he's caused, he's trying to put himself in my position & understand how I feel and the pain I'm experiencing. He's told me to keep working on myself as I'm doing really well & that we just both need to keep on our own journeys and if we end up back together then it's meant to be - I know he's right, I know I need just focus on the here & now instead of what might happen in the future. Right now we have to be apart, its in all our best interests.

He's recognised that he needs to take more of the weight with the kids/house for a while as I'm completely exhausted, I have fibromyalgia & ME/CFS so my pain & fatigue levels amongst other symptoms mean I have very little energy - this meltdown is me completely exhausted & needing more help so hoping the extra support will help me get back on track and stay there.