I'm in, Wife's Out - Pt. Two

[trc2009]

In terms of MY changes.

I've still been actively going to my IC. It's been very beneficial for me and has really helped me. I've come to realize that I'm a much more anxious person that I thought I was and this episode w/ my w has really ramped the anxiety up a bit (naturally). Using tools to deal with that has certainly helped me and I think my M as well. It's still an ongoing process for sure. I'm only going once a month now instead of every week. At some point I'll probably not have to go anymore unless I feel the need. I have a very firm grasp of where my temper comes from and the difference between being angry an controlling anger.

I've certainly been GAL. I still workout 3-4 times per week. I'm 6'2" and two years ago I ballooned to 270 lbs. I started dropping weight after my daughter was born and got down to 240 prior to my W dropping the bomb on me 4 months ago. I'm now down to 210 lbs and I'm starting to have some solid muscle tone. My goal weight is 190 lbs. I'm most definitely more appealing on the eyes than I was. That is a great confidence builder. W doesn't acknowledge it at all but who cares? I've come to realize if D does happen, that there are most certainly more fish in the sea.

Spring rolling around has helped as well. I've thrown myself into working outside around the house. That gives me something to do 2-3 nights/week when I'm not working out.

I'm more comfortable with the idea of D than I was. Right now it's just a balancing act. I have to GAL. I have to be there for my W without being too "there." I have to let things my wife says roll off my back, but I can't be a doormat. I have to be supportive and 100% committed to someone who doesn't want any type of physical contact. Nobody said it would be easy....that's for sure.