In re-reading Pearl's old threads just now, I am struck by two things that are highly different from your current situation:
1. How coach-able she was; and
2. How she laid out her boundaries ("This is what I need in a relationship; whether or not that can be YOU is entirely up to you") and then let HIM pursue, rarely (never?) waffling from that position.
I take what limited time I have to help people here and I apply it where it seems to be the most useful. You seem to like to argue with people, you drive them away, and you continue to do the same things over and over again with your BF, with very limited results.
