GM I do not know if this is 'off topic' or not, but I would be the first to admit that in terms of many posters here, I have not dealt 'well' with MLC. I have not entered a new relationship, dated, and many years on, still feel very very sad at times.
For a long time I was reluctant to admit to these feelings, even to myself. Then I realised that not to do so was inauthentic. I am rebuilding me from the ground up, and it is taking me a long time - others do it faster, and that is all there is to it. I am not a failure because I am a slow learner!
We feel what we feel, and we all deal differently with this stuff. Betrayal, disillusionment, loss of friendship, financial hardship flowing from this . . . these a take a long time to recover from. Now, when I see an implicit 'should' in a post I realise that it is others who do not want us to feel that pain - it is kindness and concern. Sometimes, also, we all make mistakes in how we approach things, and posters want to hep us. But we feel what we feel, and recovering from this takes time.
I would not dream of posting to someone who seems fine a year or so on as to whether this is authentic, I believe that they are OK, but as for me, putting my life back together and truly healing is taking a frighteningly long time. So perhaps it is the 'I am all right, why aren't you?' that we are responding to. Because we aren't, we are trying to be be OK, but it just takes some people longer, for a whole variety of reasons.
