So, why not push to have this settled and get on w/your life? It's time to push this to the max and do not let up on him. In a way, your mother is correct...but I am going one step further. Once everything is settled, he will no longer have any control over you and he will not be able to come up w/idle threats about money or the children. In a very sick way, he's losing control over you and the situation and yes, he's even losing the one last thread that binds you together. I don't think that he ever thought it would go this far in his own sick little mind, but his actions have pushed you off the mountain and now, he's got to take care of himself and the ow.
A lot of them will drag their feet even when there is nothing else to settle, but in the end, we have to be the ones to do the final pushing to end it.
As for what your h keeps saying about your attorney, tell him to pack sand. He doesn't know what he's talking about and when he gets his law degree, then you'll listen to what he has to say. He's using every tactic to get you to listen and trust him, not your lawyer. Your lawyer is right about one thing...your children shouldn't be deprived of the money no longer than necessary. In fact, many people who have children divorce and I have never heard of a lawyer wanting to "ante up" every 4 months. If anything, once the divorce and child issues are resolved, they are than happy to wish you well and move on to other cases. Now, if they are ambulance chasers or money grubbing lawyers who know what they are dealing w/when it comes to crazy making, then yes some of them will do it. But those who know their clients and know that they are trying to do the right thing, you shouldn't have to contact them again once everything is settled, unless, of course, you want to spend money.
So, whatever he's telling you about your lawyer, get your sand bucket out and pack it w/sand and the next time he mentions anything about your lawyer, hand him the filled bucket and tell him to figure it out.
No more discussions w/him about your lawyer because all it's doing to you is driving you nuts.
Sit quietly, the answers will reveal themselves when you least expect them to. The past is gone, the present is a gift and you need to focus on today, allow the future to reveal itself when it is ready.
