Positives -Wife postpones divorce and indicates she wants to make it work -pushes to go to counselor (2nd session scheduled for Tuesday) -gone on several dates and had fun on each one -sleeping on the same bed
Negatives -still seems distance (never really making conversation and unresponsive when I try to talk about her day, what's going on in life, etc); only exception is when we go on a date -is very affectionate towards our daughter but not towards me -still works with OM and still is protective of her phone -doesn't seem to make the relationship a priority (comes home and wants to work on her PC, spend time with daughter, watch TV, etc) and seems annoyed when I try to spend time with her
Overall, I get the impression that my wife is just not that in to me and I worry that she still in contact with OM. This morning she told me that she needed to go water the flowers at her brothers house (brother lives less than ten minutes away and is out of town). It took her two hours to come back (she use to make similar excuses when she was seeing OM). After the year I went through in 2013, I don't want more of the same story. I want to make this marriage work but not if she is not going to put in the same effort.
A part of me thinks that I need to let this run its course, continue to DB, follow Sandy's rules and never bring up the relationship or OM. If she is ignoring me, than just stay positive and centered in who I am. The other part of me wants to vent to the counselor with my concerns. The problem I see is that that approach will drive her away from me. I feel conflicted because I was borderline suicidal last year and had several nervous breakdowns in 2013. Just recently I feel like I am enjoying life again and I don't want to go back into being an emotional mess if she is not serious about making this relationship work. I am willing to walk away and never look back but only if I feel she is not going to make the effort.
