One year in but a newbie

[Lifes Twists]

Hi 25mlc,

I thank you for your comments. Maybe I can clarify somethings.

first point, last year I was put on a powerful steroid called prednisone.The doctor told my wife that I would begin acting crazy, which go on for a period of time. This was going to amount to about 10 weeks of time. What I endured was extreme swings of my emotions from as high as I could be to as low as I could be. I was also awake for days as a time and could have probably mowed my 2 acre lawn with a push mower in about 15 minutes.It was extreme and I have met others since who have had the same kind of reactions to the medication. I would have been better off being hospitalized for the duration rather than under my families care as they could not handle me or my reaction. I would not wish prednisone on anyone.

Point 2, I did want to participate in the decisions concerning payment for my oldest's college education. My wife shut me out of it and did what she did against my recommendations. She took out a parent loan rather than a student loan. This loan along with 2 maxed out credit cards she has accrued since moving out along with late payments and over drawn accounts has destroyed her credit. This year we had agreed to each cosign a student loan for our two older daughters now that two will be in college. She was denied and I have had to cosign both loans.

point 3, I chose not to share a bed with her at the advice of my IC. She felt that I should not even consider it.

In regards to finances, we lived on two checks. Now I pay for all the house expenses along with additional expense generated because she moved out. I have 3 girls and can't allow them to suffer because of wife's decisions. Believe me, if I could completely walk away from this right now and leave her on her own I would. Yesterday she text me at 7 am while I was heading to work. She is getting rid of the dog she insisted on getting the girls when they moved out. Unfortunately the girls are very attached to him and I am having to step in the take him in and get him trained. I also have to go down and clean the carpets in the apartment as the dog has urinated all over the place and the place smells and is unhealthy at this point. Mean while my wife is more concerned about spending easter with a male friend and his family. My older two have decided to go their own way for easter and not deal with it. I asked the youngest what she wanted to do as her mother was pressing her to go along with her to some strangers house. She decided she would rather go to six flags for the day. I am taking her and spending the day with her. Wife is very angry about this right now.

I am trying to put some distance between us without the girls getting hurt.

In regards to my personal flaws and what I am working on,I have been working on my physical health and have lost 40 lbs so far with a goal of 55lbs bringing me to 195 lbs. I am working on my listening skills and learning not to be Mr fix it when I can. I am working on improving my relationship with my daughters. I am also trying to finish the house which is still under construction and can't be sold till it gets a final CO from the building inspector. The house only has a partial CO which allowed us to live in part of it while I finished the remainder. Now some other family will enjoy my efforts. I am reading a lot of self help books to improve myself as well.